Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Reviews of Movies I Haven't Seen: "Making White Women Look Retarded," or "Bride Wars"



So apparantly Kate Hudson and Anne Hathaway are best friends, both of whose wedding gets book for the same day at the Plaza. Personally, this doesn't seem like the kind of dumbshit mistake the Plaza would make, but I do know it's under sketchy new ownership so I suppose it's plausible.

Anyway, this creates a big selfish rift in the friendship and results in nasty-bitch-shenanigans like Kate Hudson somehow being able to sneak into a tanning salon with the always helpful scarf over your head and sunglasses and fucking with Anne Hathaway's tanning session. I assume this goes on for about an hour, while their boyfriends try to figure out if they're both on the rag or just dumb spoiled bitches who can't compromise or find another suitable venue in all of New York City.

They must figure something out, because the trailor shows the both of them in wedding gowns fighting. And not sexy-underwear-jello-wrestling fighting, but lame screechy cat-fighting. I assume someone's wedding gets ruined but they apologize for being hags and end it with a double wedding.

Yay.

Oh, and it looks like maybe Dane Cook is in the movie, which must mean it's phenomenal. And Candace Bergen definitely is, reprising her now-pigeon-holed role as Stern, Business-like Older Woman.

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