In 5th, especially 6th, and 7th grade I was crazy obsessed with Leonardo DiCaprio. I seriously thought we would meet and get married. I won't reveal how many times I (made an adult take me to) saw Titanic, but it's a lot more than you're probably thinking. I'm super glad I made it through the psycho celebrity stalker phase and delusional pubescence aside, let's see how far Leo has come:
Ugh. I don't know, I'll be nice and keep it minimal and just say that he got not fat but that weird puffy/alcoholic/bloaty shit going on; he keeps the dumbest fucking facial hair that if it were not attached to a face would be the disguise they sell at a Halloween store sold as "Douchebag Goatee"; and he somehow went from boyishly adorable to suffering (embracing?) a serious case of gayface.
He pretty much just looks sloppy as shit.
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