So after a painful and heroic struggle with cancer, I'm back to blogging. No, I'm just kidding, I didn't have cancer, but I did go to Vermont and graduate college. So I'm feeling into this. Lying about having cancer just reminded me that I just don't get people who are superstitious about this shit. Like, all these people I know think it's bad luck to lie and say your grandma, mom (if your ballsy), uncle, whatever died as an excuse to miss school/work. What, like your grandma is going to actually have a stroke/succumb to cancer/die because you used her as an excuse? Whatever, my Nana would be like, go ahead (This isn't true). I once told a professor I missed so much class because my son was really sick and because I'm a single mom I had to stay home with him. Now I don't have a fucking son but I don't think it's bad karma. What would the consequence of this one be? I get pregnant and actually do become a single mom? My future unborn son is a sickly little pussy who has a peanut allergy? I don't know. But let's say God does smite me and strike me down, any of the above coffins would be totally cool with me. I don't really care which one, I like the fish though, just make sure don't have a boring coffin.
On second thought, I do text A LOT so maybe the cell phone coffin would be fitting but kind of embarrassing. Oh and is that lizard one a baby's coffin? Morbid!